I've had enough

The HIV/AIDS and gay debate has been going on for so long and I’ve decided to stop being fed-up with all the heterosexist remarks and comments. I mean people are all entitled to their opinions so am I. So since I’m an abomination to society, a person who spreads HIV/AIDS (no heterosexuals NEVER spread the virus, they are immune, since HIV/AIDS is a “gay disease”). So laws against my kind is okay to “protect” the innocent heterosexuals, who by the way, are all faithful to their partners (both females and males) and only gays have promiscuous sex and sex outside of marriage. Oops I forgot, we can only have sex outside marriage because it is NEVER for us because it breaks up the family unit and society. I mean, there are no such things as single mothers or fathers in the heterosexual world, no abuse cases, I mean these things only happen because there are gays around. Without gays, these problems will all be solved. The “family” will be sacred again.

So heterosexist people in my book will henceforth be called idiots and ass-holes (or idiotic ass-holes). They spread stupidity and intolerance. So in my book they are incurable. So if you are heterosexist, just remember you are an idiot and ass-hole. Simple. We are gays with a gay disease that is incurable and you are heterosexist with a heterosexist disease that is also incurable. So idiots, try to use condoms and stop spreading your idiotic ass-holism around. The world would be a better place if you don’t have children to spread your idiotic ass-holism in.

Gosh, I feel better now knowing that idiotic ass-holes live just to irritate the world. This would be the last time (I promise myself) that I'll be bothered with idiotic ass-holes. They can believe what they want and I will believe that they are idiots who aren't worth my time at all.

With that done, I’ll now go on to my Church, the Catholic Church. Imagine the first time in 2000 years, the Pope couldn’t give his Easter blessings. It is so very embarrassing. The head of a Church who can’t even do this simple task. Isn’t time he retired? Yes, for those who don’t know, the Pope has to declare that he wants to retire or step down as the Pope then a new one will be elected. But then again the Vatican is more of a political machine than a spiritual place. So please don’t mix the 2 up. The Vatican is the place where politics is played which has nothing to do with the Church proper where spirituality is preached.

Another earthquake in Indonesia

Gosh, like Indonesia needed another earthquake. It is so sad to realised that another one struck Indonesia, south of Sumatra. This time the death toll is said to be about 1000 but I have my doubts. It usually is never this low, especially when the tremors could be felt in Singapore. It seems worse than the last one but it wasn’t in fact it was less (8.2) but it doesn’t make things any better for the people who are still trying to get their lives back together.

Let us offer up a moment of silence for the dead and also to pray to whichever higher power you believe in to help the people in their grief and woes.

The birthtday aftermath

It was so nice. My birthday was yesterday and I got to spend about 28 hours with T. It was great. It is things like this that make me wish we could get married and the live together. Since the first option is not possible, the living together would be nice. But that would also have problems of its own. Like having to ‘justify’ to parents (on both sides) why we have a ‘room-mate’ or why are we not getting our own place but ‘renting’. *sigh* life is just full of problems when you are gay and in love. It is wonderful too, to sneek away from the problems that gays face and enjoy the company of each other (without the problems) for just one day. Short as it might be.

On this day (or was it yesterday), the movie “Moulin Rouge” came to mind where Ewan McGregor said that “Everyone wants to love and to be loved in return”. I think it was said by him in “Moulin Rouge” I could be wrong. But I do realise how true this statement this. I think this is one of the things everyone in the world is looking for be it the love of a friend, family member, partner or even a pet.

All the time I’ve spent with T made me realise how much I have come to love him and how much he loves me. This love seems to grow and not diminish with being with him for about 18 months now. Wow, 18 months, this would be the second longest relationship I’ve been in till date. My longest was 3.5 years long with A, that went bust when his depression took over his logic. So sad, he believed that he could bet his depression by himself but in the end it almost destroyed him. Last I heard he was seeing a shrink. It wasn’t a good parting…… but I survived and moved on.

Well, one shouldn’t dwell too much into the past but remember the good times in it and learn from the bad. After A, I was serious with D but that lasted for a year. A very trying year of the both of us. D and I were so different and this time opposites repelled. But we parted as friends and till now we still keep in touch and meet up once in a while to catch up. We both agreed that we made a very bad couple but at least we tried (boy did we try to work out our differences). Goes to show that good friends don’t necessarily make great couples.

BIRTHDAY TIME!

My birthday today. T has planned a full day for me :). We are going to spend at least the next 24 hours together. So exciting.

If you believe

“People believe what they want to believe”

How true this statement is! Today in the Straits Times, a mother of 2 rebutted to the AIDS problem and the banning of snowball’04. She believed that gays and lesbians are made (nurture) and she believed that they can be ‘converted’ to the ‘alternative lifestyle’.

And here I am a gay man trying to figure out what the ‘gay/lesbian lifestyle’ and ‘alternative lifestyle’ is? According to dictionary.com lifestyle is “A way of life or style of living that reflects the attitudes and values of a person or group”. I have to presume the ‘lifestyle’ of the gay/lesbian community (according to the heterosexist) is party, sex, all the immoral and things that are detrimental to the family and society. What about those that don’t party? Those that don’t use drugs or even have casual sex? Those that have been faithful to one partner for the past 40 years*?

Most of us GLBT want to fall in love and grow old with the person we love. Is there anything wrong with that? And most of us don’t believe in casual sex. There are those that do but then there are also these people in the straight community that do to, even some of the married ones.

The stigmas that the heterosexist people have placed upon the gay/lesbian community is not something that doesn’t happen to the straight community. Talk about anything the gay/lesbian community does that is the ‘gay (alternative) lifestyle’ and I’ll show you that it can also be found in the straight community.

But then again, you can place scientific evidence^# before heterosexist people they still will not believe that we are born (nature) this way. Who in the right mind would want to choose to be gay/lesbian? To be scorned by majority of society? To not have support from friends and family? Even Allan Pease, Barbara Pease, the authors of “Why Men Don't Listen and Women Can't Read Maps: How We're Different and What to Do About It” (ISBN 0767907639) states that being gay/lesbian is NOT a choice. People believe what they want to believe.

I have to add that sexuality is a spectrum and not black and white issue. If people start realising that, thanks would be easier. I think this article explains this very well but……

I think that lots of misconception stems from ignorance, something that narrow/closed minded people can never get rid of. Recently I spoke to a Muslim friend of mine and realised that he hate the Jews because he said they were dirty, not fearful of God (pagans in fact) and that he would never be friends or get to know a Jew because he/she was a Jew. Gosh, I was astounded! I could not believe that the deep resentment for a group of people is because of ignorance and that he and people like him will never bother to open their minds to know the other party before making judgements. And mind you he’s not a very devout Muslim either (not gay).

Armed with that I went to talk to my Jewish friends and found out that they felt the same way. Wow! No wonder there can never be any reconciliation between the 2 peoples. I’ve also found out that the gay Jews were more willing to get to know the Muslims (or try and they said) then their heterosexual counterparts. I have a feeling this is because we know what it is like to be judged by labels and we (the GLBT community) is trying (most of us anyway) not to do that.

I believe that being discriminated against has it merits. It makes us more mindful that there are other different people out there and that nobody should be judged especially not by preconceived ideas. Understanding comes after tolerance.


* There are a lot of same sex couples that have not been in the 'limelight' because their relationships last without the bond (binding) of marriage. It is a cause for celebration as it is not easy without the support of government and society. I take my hat off to all couples (straight or otherwise) that are not married and yet have built a life together.
# There have been lots of scientific papers published that shows that homosexuals are born not made. One of the best papers that I’ve read is “Sexually dimorphic gene expression in mouse brain precedes gonadal differentiation” by Phoebe Dewing et al, Molecular Brain Research 118 (2003) 82-90.

As I said before......

My parents can NEVER listen to my opinions. As I suspected, they rearranged my room when I was out of the house! So pissed.

They really don't realise that their bloody ideas are not welcomed at all!

OM......

My room? Yea riiiiiiiiight...

My parents want to ‘renovate’ my room again. And again, they tell me what they want to do, not asking for my opinion mind you, telling.

“So we’ll be changing your window chest of drawers,” my mom.
“What? Why?” me
“So that you have more space to put your stuff.”
“But I don’t need more space.”
“It would be better.”

I said I didn’t want it and it was insisted on me saying that it would be better for me and then the justification comes in. When it comes to my room, or more like my pseudo-room, my opinions never matters, their opinions are the only ones that matter.

So fed-up, it is always like that. They make a decision and just do it. No consultation, just “we are going to this to ‘your’ room, it is for your own good so it is no use saying you don’t want it”.

Gosh, I need to move out!

Yea, if I did I wouldn’t hear the end of it. So now I just have to sit back and wait till I’m 35 to get an apartment of my own. *sigh* long time more to go. Which means that there’ll be lots of bitching and being angry about the lack of freedom. This isn’t good. Must try to be patient and just accept the things that I cannot change. Ha! This coming from an impatient and hot-tempered person. But must try. Om......

The rise of HIV infection in Singapore

It is amazing that our ministers are allowed to spew nonsense and nobody contradicts them, especially when it concerns the GLBT community.

I think that it is time the gahmen of Singapore realises that we are also their citizens and that since we are a secular society where religion has no part to pay in politics or gahmen policies, they should stop trying to marginalise us anymore. Yes, we are different, we love people of the same sex but making us out to be criminals and the bearer of death is not going to solve the problem. The gahmen has always been like this for as long as I know, in order to please the majority, they would sacrifice the minority, in order to get re-elected they would prefer to fan stereotypes then to allow groups or societies to educate the masses. And no, we DO NOT recruit, being gay is not a choice, even though I believe that most of our members of parliament believe that it is. Gosh, are they still living in the Victorian era? Why is it what people do in private is of concern to the gahmen? They are even trying to decriminalise oral sex! Gosh.

As a so-called 'first world' country, we still have decade to catch up with the other first world countries in terms of opinions and mind-sets and policies that don't discriminate. Even Taiwan and Hong Kong, countries that have not obtained their first world status is even more open minded and accepting of different types of people than we are. Taiwan is talking about giving equal rights to same-sex couples and Hong Kong has been holding a gay and lesbian film festival for the past 16 years and they had a gay and lesbian conference last year that was organised by the government of Hong Kong.

Yes, the rise is a concern, but making unjust, homophobic and baseless statements in parliament by the senior minister of health will not help the already bad situation, in fact it would make it worse, gay men or more correctly, men have sex with men (some who don't call themselves gay) will go underground and stop testing themselves. The straight community would start to think that HIV/AIDS is a 'gay disease' and become complacent. Too bad he didn't engage what little brains he had before starting his mouth. Oh by the way Balaji Sadasivan (the aforementioned minister) won an "Just Shut Up" Award.



Taken from mrbrown.com
Hypothesis: Aids MAY be spread by gays breathing on you!!!

I propose that the Government ban all gay parties, especially on our National Day. I read that nine out of 10 of the new Aids sufferers in Singapore last year, are men and a third of them are gay. It’s them darn homo parties, I tell you.

Dr Balaji Sadasivan, who won a spot in David Salyer's "Just Shut Up" Awards, did say it was only a hypothesis, and more research needs to be done.

Sure, hypothesis only, but can get mentioned on the front page of ST first.

And what's up with the "unnamed expert"? Why? Scared all the angry homos go and scold this expert, issit? Or worse, go there and breathe on him to give him Aids, issit?

You don't know, meh? Aids MAY be spread by gay people breathing on the rest of us "normal" people. It's so far only a hypothesis by an expert who shall remain unnamed, and more research needs to be done. But I thought I'd mention it first.



Even Mr Miyagi made a great points.

Two-thirds of AIDS sufferers may say Straits Times is spot-on

They cannot possibly be so dumb, folks.

Don't buy it. In every sense of the word. The statement, and especially, the reporting of the statement. They cannot possibly be so gong.

I'm pulling a very long bow here, but I think the ST may be just trying to make itself more relevant, albeit in a very, very perverse way. So, don't buy a word they're saying. They may be just pulling your chains so you'll talk about them. They may be just making you wonder who that 'unnamed expert' is, whether he/she is from the CDC, the MOH or from some department totally unrelated to health and medicine, but so happens to be an epidemiologist.

I mean, they may just want you to do the math and get worked up: 1/3 of new AIDS cases are gay means 'gay parties may have led to a sharp rise in new AIDS cases'.

They also may just want you to know how they're tackling the epidemic, and how it is global, because gays from high prevalent societies, they come to party and end up 'seeding the local community with infection'.

Right now, you may be thinking about what the MOH is doing to work and manage a cure, whether anyone at the Biopolis Hub Thing is working on something, whether there are drug trials, whether they'll do something once Snowball and Nation moves to Bangkok and the number of AIDS cases rises anyway, and whether they'll say 1/3 of new AIDS cases are gay means gay parties in Bangkok may have led to a sharp rise in AIDS cases because gay men went to Bangkok, whether we may be living in the Dark Ages.

You may say what you want, but don't say Straits Times never make you think!


P.S. mrbrown and Mr Miyagi are straight and married but NOT narrow*

* This 'clause' is there just in case some people think that only the GLBT community think this way.