Another wedding banquet

Today I attended a friend’s wedding. It was nice catching up with people whom I’ve not seen for some time. Later on when they were doing a screening of their lives together (the marring couple) I felt sad. Sad because T and I will never have a chance to have family and friends together to enjoy and give us their blessings. The world is just so unfair but then again since when is the world fair.

Even if we are in a place (like Canada) where same-sex marriages are permitted, this type of celebration of the union will never happen. I have thought about this and I realised that in the Asian context, it has never been anything to do with religion or religious views, in face Buddhism never stated that anything is sinful or wrong (except when it causes great harm to another person) unless you indulge in it. Like drinking, sex, etc. In Asia, the important part of getting married is so that you can continue the family name. This is our culture. So unlike in America (yea, the ‘greatest’ human rights country) where the objection to same-sex marriages is based in Christianity, in Asia it is because of carrying on the family line.

So there I was sitting there, enjoying the wedding banquet and my friends but felling very sad that this can never happen to me.

West Wing and more

I just watched the “West Wing” episode 25 (yes, yes I know it is really OLD but hey I just obtained the DVDs recently so don’t flame me. :P I love the show but I think this episode really stands out because of the way the President (played by Martin Sheen) reprimanded a Laura Schlessinger like person. If you are interested to know more about it you can go to this site and read it.

I don’t want to comment anything about it. I want to talk about the fundamentalist christians’ reaction to it.

I’ve read a number of websites dedicated to this ‘speech’ and most of them are by the fundamentalist christians’ who cited reasons why this speech is flawed. And the most important thing that hit me is that they say we (GLTB and the producers of “West Wing”) take these verses out of context. Gosh! The audacity! So when we quote the bible to justify our existence (created not made and still loved by God) we are taking it out of context and when they do it, it is right and proper. No they definitely do not take the quotes against homosexuality out of context. Of course not, why Jesus came to preach separation, discrimination and bigotry. He came to condemn the sinners and to exalt the Jews, especially the Pharisees and Sadducees. He told people to judge because by judging, your Father in heaven will praise you.

These people believed that Jesus will condemn the GLTB community if he was alive today. The same way the Pharisees and Sadducees believed that the Christ would condemn the tax-collectors and prostitutes of that time. Jesus welcomed the outcast, telling them that God loves them because they are his children. And that is the most important part of Jesus teachings, loving the outcast, Jesus never gave lip service, he did these things. That is why Mother Teresa is considered a Saint (note the capital S) because she really was Jesus in the flesh. She loved the outcast and loved being seen with them, like Jesus who preferred to be with the outcast then with the rich, wealthy and effluent.

The all loving, all accepting Catholic Church

Gay Catholics Denied Communion
by 365Gay.com Newscenter Staff

Posted: May 16, 2005 12:01 am ET

(St. Paul, Minnesota) A group of about 100 gay Roman Catholics and their supporters were denied Holy Communion at Pentecost Mass at the Cathedral of St. Paul on Sunday.

The Rainbow Sash Alliance has been taking Communion on Pentecost at the Cathedral for the past four years, but Archbishop Harry Flynn changed the policy this year, under pressure from the Vatican.

Earlier this month Flynn, in a letter to the Rainbow Sash Alliance, warned that members would be denied communion because their sashes were seen as a protest against Catholic teaching and unacceptable to the Vatican.

"I am asking you to remove your sashes before you receive Holy Communion," Flynn wrote. "I ask you to observe this sign of respect for the Eucharist not only in the Cathedral but in all our parishes. No one wearing the sash will be permitted to receive the Blessed Sacrament."

The Rainbow Sash movement is an international organization of lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender Catholics and their families and friends.

Among those who attended mass Sunday were Dominican Sister Donna Quinn, director of the National Coalition of American Nuns, Joseph and Barbara Parot of Parents and Friends of Lesbians and Gays (PFLAG) and long time Catholic gay rights activist Rick Garcia.

After the sash wearers were denied, Sister Donna, the Parots and Garcia approached the altar and received Communion. To the surprise of some, including the sash wearers, the four then approached the sash-wearers and gave them a portion of their consecrated hosts.

"It is a scandal that the Body of Christ would be denied to a baptized Catholic who approached the altar simply because of what he or she was wearing. I am still shocked and in disbelief that the priest would deny these people," said Sister Donna Quinn. "The Eucharist should not be used as a political tool and that is exactly what Cardinal George has made it."

Sister Quinn and the Parots approached the priest after Mass and expressed their displeasure and sadness at his action.

"Some priests and bishops throughout the country have denied communion to sash wearers today. How many of these same priests have ever denied anyone else communion?" Garcia asked. "This has nothing to do with upholding Church teaching and it has everything to do with rank anti-gay sentiment."

©365Gay.com 2005

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Oh yea, Jesus came to teach us discrimination and he came save only the few, I get it now.

Working in Australia

I have been holding an Australian PR since January last year. I have been planning to work in Australia for a while now and maybe become an Australian or come back after a number of years (thinking for 8 to 10, to gain enough experience). Who knows what the future holds. All I know is that I'm not making any plans that are caste in stone. Just praying for discernment and knowing that the Lord will bless and help me.

A number of people asked my why PR if I just wanted to work there. There is a simple reason, there is no way I'll get a job here if I require a work permit. Unlike in Singapore, getting work permits in Australia is a great hassle and no company would bother to hire a foreigner if there is local equivalent. Less hassle.

I've just sent my CV to a professor that I spoke to earlier today (I was at a conference and so happens his lab is in Melbourne). He gave me a short interview and said that I fit in perfectly to what they required to replace a person that has left. So I'd most probably get this job and I really hope so.

So the wheels have started turning and things seem to be moving very smoothly. I am blessed.

T knows about my plans and because of this he has decided that he would like to do what I'm doing too, get PR to work in Australia for a while. The experience would do us both good. I know things would work out well, with the Lord guiding and blessing me.

Discrimination - Singapore style

A few days ago, there was an article in the newspaper regarding this condominium in Singapore that told a security agency that they didn’t want Indian security guards, I thought, “wow, Singapore is starting to be very bold in their discrimination”.

Today in the Straits Times forum page, there were a lot of people who cried foul about this, saying that discrimination and bigotry should have no place in a society in Singapore. Now that got me thinking, if it was an ad for no gays wanted or allowing of a gay activity (like a forum, talk or party) would these people still say things the same way or is anti-discrimination only for races or age or religion but not sexual orientation. Well, this is what Martha Luther King predicted when he was fighting racism in America. He said (to paraphrase) “a threat to anyone's basic rights is a threat to everyone's basic rights”. This is so true. I speculate that the committee of the condominium is Chinese (most probably), effluent and English speaking, which makes them think that their own prejudices are valid. It starts off with one group and it will extend to others, this is how discrimination works, especially when one group of people think they are better and more superior to another. And as we can see, it has started. Discrimination against minorities in Singapore is nothing new, starting with older workers, going onto gays and lesbians and now race. Well, we have no anti-discrimination laws here. Lets see how long the gahmen can pretend that these laws are not needed but then even if they do, the GLTB community will NOT benefit from it.

These people, like the right wing Christians in Singapore, who think that their own opinions and values (which are religiously based) are the opinions and values of the whole of Singapore, don’t these people know that Christians only account for at most 20% of Singapore’s population!* It is not even the a simple majority of the population. Gosh, who are they to dictate to the masses? Preaching to a mostly Buddhist population. Good examples are the casino where they believed their opinion hold the ultimate truth because their religion is the ultimate truth, see that is discrimination by itself. The other is the fight against AIDS, they are so against preaching condom usage that it has started to make matters worse. There are more and more people in Singapore who are having sex without a condom, especially with people they don’t know. They believe their own morals is right, but they account for less than 20% of the population, who are they, the minority, to dictate, to the majority that they should be faithful to one partner. Their words fall on deaf ears but do they know that? No! So instead of AIDS support groups like Afa going the, use a condom route, they are forcing them and indeed the gahmen to go the abstinence route. Is this working? Nope, but they still will not change their tune because they believe they have the ultimate true. When will people realise that if another doesn’t belong to your group, they will never listen. Imagine, the LOUD minority.


*In 2000 the number of people who declared that they are Christians was 14.6% (up from 12.7% in 1990). Compare this with people who declared that they were Buddhist in 2000 was 42.5% (up from 31.2% in 1990)

Benedict XVI

Well a new pope has been elected, another 'conservative'. Whether he'll be different from John Paul II, the activists around the world don't think so. I still think the church will be as oppressive and they will still have the opinion that the world's problems are 'black and white'. We shall see in the next 6 months if he’s going to let the Spirit work or box it up again.

I think that the word conservative has been overused in practically everything in this world. And it has come to a point where the world means being narrow-minded. If I recall correctly, being conservative used to be someone who favours traditional views and values but not a person who discounts change. When did being conservative mean being a bigot and discriminating?

*sigh* well, we do live in the world where money and power is everything, what makes me think that a church will be any different.

The Church - good, bad and ugly

I read this in the Sunday Times today and was really impressed with Ignatius’ view. He just hit the nail on the head. The parts I have bolded are the good things the pope John Paul II has done. The red/bold parts are the ones that are so ugly about the church and as you can see, the ugly seems to outweigh the good. What good is being part of a Church where you are oppressed? I wonder if the Vatican ever wonder why people are leaving the Church, or even if they really care.

Sometimes people ask why I'm still in a Church that is so oppressive? I have given it alot of thought and I thing Ignatius stated it in a great way some of us reject the teachings outwardly and other inwardly. I'm the ones that reject the Church inwardly. I love my God and I know God loves me. I go and worship him with my community but I do reject some of the Church teachings. As Cannon law has stated, that a person can reject a teaching of the Church if he, guided by the Spirit, learns the truth about something (very badly parapharsed).

#######################

A Plea to the next pope
By Ignatius Low
(Taken from The Sunday Times April 17, 2005)

Someone remarked to me that other day that with a name like mine I should be “eminently qualified” to write about Pope John Paul II.

Well, if being qualified simply means being Catholic, then she is probably right.

I know if only a handful of other guys name “Ignatius” and they are all, without exception, Catholics born and bred. Who else would name themselves after the Spanish saint Ignatius de Loyola, who found the Jesuit order of priests in the 1500s?

Indeed, to the outside world, the name is obscure and extremely difficult to pronounce and spell. To this day, when asked for my name by Coffee Bean and Tea Leaf cashiers, I agonise for a moment before muttering “David”, so as not to hold up the queue behind me.

Despite life’s little inconveniences, I am still proud of the name my parents gave me in the zeal of their conversion to Catholicism in the 1960s.

But I have also stopped practising my religion for almost a decade now. So, I think my name is just about the only thing left that’s “Catholic” about me.

Until the Pope died, that is.

I was holidaying in Tokyo when it happened and rationally speaking, I really shouldn’t have cared.

Yet in the days and hours reading up to the Pope’s death, I found myself glued to the television set in my service apartment, never tiring of the endless updates about this health on CNN and BBC.

My Catholic upbringing came back to me in a flash of nostalgia.

I remembered, for example, kneeling to pray the rosary twice a week and constantly wishing that I could sit down instead. I remembered singing hymns with my younger sister as my dad played the guitar, and feeling rather intimidated by a group of bash girls at my weekly Sunday school class.

I found I could still recall enough of the meanings of strange words like “catechism”, “Eucharist” and “transubstantiation” to explain them excitedly to my Buddhist travelling companion. And I could expertly answer his questions about the difference between “mortal” and “venial” sins, and the significance of the Virgin Mary to the Church.

Buried somewhere deep within me, I realised, is a good Catholic boy. It’s just the on a day-to-day level, most people don’t see it – net even me.

This is arguable the most serious problem Pope John Paul II left the Catholic Church to deal with after his death.

Like me, millions of Catholics around the world have quietly fallen away from the faith. And like me, they seem perfectly comfortable with what they have done.

Of course, religion is a very personal issue and everyone has his own reasons for turning his back on it.

But if there is a general root cause to be found, I would point to the growing disconnect between the Catholic dogma and today’s realities.

For those who don’t already know, the Catholic Church is strongly against divorce, abortion and contraception.

It still refuses to ordain women as priests and regards homosexuality as a “new ideology of evil”.

And it sees all these issues in stark black and white.

Two years ago, a nine-year-old Nicaraguan girl became pregnant after she was raped. Fearing that she would not survive childbirth, her parents sent her for an abortion.

The Catholic Church intervened and nearly stopped the procedure, but the girl’s parents insisted. After the abortion, the whole family was promptly excommunicated from the Church.

There are many mare such moral dilemmas that the Church seems to take an unreasonably hard stand on. It won’t, for example, allow a HIV-positive husband to use condoms to protect his HIV-negative wife. Nor will it grant an abused wife a divorce from a violent husband.

As a result, you will often find that Catholics tend to harbour two views on life’s moral dilemmas.

There is the “Catholic” view which they are suppose to hold, and then there is their own view – which is softer and will admit to exceptions and special circumstances.

Okay, this probably doesn’t stop the average churchgoer from going to Mass every Sunday.

But it deducts from a sense of belonging to a religion whose structure and rituals already make it seem so far away.

The principle does not just apply to religion. If someone does not quite agree with the fundamental ethos of his club, company or even country, can he truly identify himself with it?

And so when push comes to shove, is there something stronger than habit, obligation or sheer inertia that makes him stay?

In his 26 years as Pope, John Paul II did many great things. He helped to bridge the gap between the Church and Islam, and speed up the fall of communism. He also used the mass media in a very effective way to get the Church’s message out globally.

But John Paul II also chose to harden the Church’s conservative stance in livewire moral issues, and throughout this reign, the Church has shown a refusal to engage the population on them.

This is something which this generation of young Catholics have become used to as we grew up. Sadly, it’s also something many of us have come to reject – whether inwardly or outwardly.

The world waits in bated breath is the Catholic Church chooses John Paul II’s successor this week.

Whoever he is, he need to talk to the silent millions around the world, who like me are Catholic, but only really in name.

Heterosexism - viewpoint of a father and grandfather

It is very heartening to read e-mails like this about the heterosexism that is so prevalent in ‘loving Christians’.


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As a 75 year old man and father of 8 children - 2 whom are gay - I find this all to be very disturbing. Since when did we allow Preachers - deacons & ministers to tell us what GOD wants?

MY children are all grown and range from mid 30's to 50 - they are ALL law abiding citizens and tax payers......do not my gay
children deserve the same rights and the other 6 ?

This whole Right Wing Agenda has gotten way out of control from their original concept of Concern for peoples well-being - to Hate Mongering & Bigotry ... trying to use "God's word" as scare tactics to get people to vote their way.

I'd like to know.... when is this country going to wise up and practice what it preaches. America is constantly telling other countries about Freedoms and Liberty, and the ever famous Justice for All.....All?

Does America mean - only Heterosexuals??? This is the 21st century.....the sky won't be falling. I think heterosexuals have done enough damage to Marriage without trying to blame gay people for ruining it.

I and my wife love our children Equally - we're on our 53rd year of Marriage together...we stuck it out thru thick and thin, and love each other very much - and have 8 happy and healthy, loving and respectful children to prove it.

I fought in WW2 - for Freedom and Liberty -- NOT Hate and Discrimination in America......This needs to stop! I used to vote Republican as did my wife for years - but this last election made us go Democrat --- I will not tolerate discrimination against my children PERIOD!

John Rex Costello
Philadelphia Pa

Buried at last!

Thank goodness the pope is now buried and gone. All this hype over his ‘death’ is really too much and the fact that people (especially the Catholics) are crying over his death is ridiculous!

We are an ‘Alleluia people’ wrote St. Augustine, where is our Alleluia now? We are to rejoice in the death of a faithful because that is what Christ taught us, death is not the end but a beginning. I agree that we should feel sad because the person is no longer with us but I think for our sadness to over shadow our joy in being an Easter people is really too much, this was really shown in the actions of Catholics the world over. And to think we are still in the Easter season!

Now that he has be buried, we can go back to living our lives again. Has anything changed? No. Has the world become a worse or better place? No. Is God still working in this world? YES! I think what my priest said in his homily on the day the pope died (3rd April 2005) that our faith is built on Christ, our Risen Lord and nothing else, not his birth or his death but by the simple fact that he rose from the dead. It was a real slap in the face for all who were grieving for the pope (a man), provided if the people who heard it could understand the greater meaning of what he said. Christ in the foundation of our faith, nothing else, not the pope, not the Vatican and definitely no the religious. And here we are moaning for the death of a man like there is no tomorrow.

The pope has died

I’m glad that he has died. Firstly, at least his suffering is over and he has returned back to the Father’s house. Secondly, it is time for him to let go of the chair (of St. Peter) and let another person take over the duties.

I don’t feel a great loss at the passing of this pope, for the Lord will appoint another person to lead the Church, whether for the better or for the worse, we will not know until the now pope starts his reign.

A lot of people in the world (especially the Catholics) have no idea how much this pope has done to halt the progress of the Church (halting Vatican II). The following are a few things that I can remember:

1) Women are not allowed to preach in Church, he even made it clearer during his reign although there have been Churches that broken this law and I applaud them for it.
2) The no ordination of women as priest. I'm still wondering why? What is wrong with having women priest? I believe that the Church is losing the ideas and inspirations of half of its population because of this bigotry.
3) His Pro-family stance. Of course this is a good thing but his definition of a family is the one father and mother and kids. Because of his non-acceptance of the gay population many families have been broken because a son/daughter came out of the closet. This is so "Pro-family", destroying the ones that don’t meet with his criteria of a family.
4) His unwavering stance against contraception. This really caused uproars in the world because most people are not Catholics but all because of his position as the 'moral compass' the world hears his voice. It made it more difficult for AIDS activist to educate people because most governments frown upon the preaching of condom usage but abstinence. Abstinence is good but how many people believe it? How can you preach to the world when majority of them don't believe in what you preach?


Somehow bringing the Church up to date with the progress of the world was not in his agenda. He would prefer to please the conservative people in the Church and in the ranks then to allow God's love to flow through the land. The Vatican has always had this problem of trying to put the Holy Spirit in a box but the Holy Spirit cannot be contained or controlled, too bad they just don't understand it.

"Give to Caser what belongs to Caser, give to God what belongs to God". I have realised that most preachers and leaders of the Church never follow this teaching of Christ, only one I have encountered was Mother Teressa, who in my heart is a much greater person then pope John Paul II will ever be. Her life was the Gospel and she believed in loving all regardless of race, language, class, sexuality orientation, education qualifications; something I pray that all leaders and preachers of the gospel will be one day.

When will the Vatican realise that God loves everyone and anyone. Not just the people who adhere to their own brand of morality. Too bad they never remember the times when the Church was corrupt and the times when they made mistakes*, too bad they didn't learn.

I pray that the next pope would be a champion for humans, not for popularity or power but for the belief that every human being is a child of God.

* The Church used to preach that people without white skin are spawn of the devil and unnatural. And let us not forget because of the pope's need for power and control the reformation was born.

I've had enough

The HIV/AIDS and gay debate has been going on for so long and I’ve decided to stop being fed-up with all the heterosexist remarks and comments. I mean people are all entitled to their opinions so am I. So since I’m an abomination to society, a person who spreads HIV/AIDS (no heterosexuals NEVER spread the virus, they are immune, since HIV/AIDS is a “gay disease”). So laws against my kind is okay to “protect” the innocent heterosexuals, who by the way, are all faithful to their partners (both females and males) and only gays have promiscuous sex and sex outside of marriage. Oops I forgot, we can only have sex outside marriage because it is NEVER for us because it breaks up the family unit and society. I mean, there are no such things as single mothers or fathers in the heterosexual world, no abuse cases, I mean these things only happen because there are gays around. Without gays, these problems will all be solved. The “family” will be sacred again.

So heterosexist people in my book will henceforth be called idiots and ass-holes (or idiotic ass-holes). They spread stupidity and intolerance. So in my book they are incurable. So if you are heterosexist, just remember you are an idiot and ass-hole. Simple. We are gays with a gay disease that is incurable and you are heterosexist with a heterosexist disease that is also incurable. So idiots, try to use condoms and stop spreading your idiotic ass-holism around. The world would be a better place if you don’t have children to spread your idiotic ass-holism in.

Gosh, I feel better now knowing that idiotic ass-holes live just to irritate the world. This would be the last time (I promise myself) that I'll be bothered with idiotic ass-holes. They can believe what they want and I will believe that they are idiots who aren't worth my time at all.

With that done, I’ll now go on to my Church, the Catholic Church. Imagine the first time in 2000 years, the Pope couldn’t give his Easter blessings. It is so very embarrassing. The head of a Church who can’t even do this simple task. Isn’t time he retired? Yes, for those who don’t know, the Pope has to declare that he wants to retire or step down as the Pope then a new one will be elected. But then again the Vatican is more of a political machine than a spiritual place. So please don’t mix the 2 up. The Vatican is the place where politics is played which has nothing to do with the Church proper where spirituality is preached.

Another earthquake in Indonesia

Gosh, like Indonesia needed another earthquake. It is so sad to realised that another one struck Indonesia, south of Sumatra. This time the death toll is said to be about 1000 but I have my doubts. It usually is never this low, especially when the tremors could be felt in Singapore. It seems worse than the last one but it wasn’t in fact it was less (8.2) but it doesn’t make things any better for the people who are still trying to get their lives back together.

Let us offer up a moment of silence for the dead and also to pray to whichever higher power you believe in to help the people in their grief and woes.

The birthtday aftermath

It was so nice. My birthday was yesterday and I got to spend about 28 hours with T. It was great. It is things like this that make me wish we could get married and the live together. Since the first option is not possible, the living together would be nice. But that would also have problems of its own. Like having to ‘justify’ to parents (on both sides) why we have a ‘room-mate’ or why are we not getting our own place but ‘renting’. *sigh* life is just full of problems when you are gay and in love. It is wonderful too, to sneek away from the problems that gays face and enjoy the company of each other (without the problems) for just one day. Short as it might be.

On this day (or was it yesterday), the movie “Moulin Rouge” came to mind where Ewan McGregor said that “Everyone wants to love and to be loved in return”. I think it was said by him in “Moulin Rouge” I could be wrong. But I do realise how true this statement this. I think this is one of the things everyone in the world is looking for be it the love of a friend, family member, partner or even a pet.

All the time I’ve spent with T made me realise how much I have come to love him and how much he loves me. This love seems to grow and not diminish with being with him for about 18 months now. Wow, 18 months, this would be the second longest relationship I’ve been in till date. My longest was 3.5 years long with A, that went bust when his depression took over his logic. So sad, he believed that he could bet his depression by himself but in the end it almost destroyed him. Last I heard he was seeing a shrink. It wasn’t a good parting…… but I survived and moved on.

Well, one shouldn’t dwell too much into the past but remember the good times in it and learn from the bad. After A, I was serious with D but that lasted for a year. A very trying year of the both of us. D and I were so different and this time opposites repelled. But we parted as friends and till now we still keep in touch and meet up once in a while to catch up. We both agreed that we made a very bad couple but at least we tried (boy did we try to work out our differences). Goes to show that good friends don’t necessarily make great couples.

BIRTHDAY TIME!

My birthday today. T has planned a full day for me :). We are going to spend at least the next 24 hours together. So exciting.

If you believe

“People believe what they want to believe”

How true this statement is! Today in the Straits Times, a mother of 2 rebutted to the AIDS problem and the banning of snowball’04. She believed that gays and lesbians are made (nurture) and she believed that they can be ‘converted’ to the ‘alternative lifestyle’.

And here I am a gay man trying to figure out what the ‘gay/lesbian lifestyle’ and ‘alternative lifestyle’ is? According to dictionary.com lifestyle is “A way of life or style of living that reflects the attitudes and values of a person or group”. I have to presume the ‘lifestyle’ of the gay/lesbian community (according to the heterosexist) is party, sex, all the immoral and things that are detrimental to the family and society. What about those that don’t party? Those that don’t use drugs or even have casual sex? Those that have been faithful to one partner for the past 40 years*?

Most of us GLBT want to fall in love and grow old with the person we love. Is there anything wrong with that? And most of us don’t believe in casual sex. There are those that do but then there are also these people in the straight community that do to, even some of the married ones.

The stigmas that the heterosexist people have placed upon the gay/lesbian community is not something that doesn’t happen to the straight community. Talk about anything the gay/lesbian community does that is the ‘gay (alternative) lifestyle’ and I’ll show you that it can also be found in the straight community.

But then again, you can place scientific evidence^# before heterosexist people they still will not believe that we are born (nature) this way. Who in the right mind would want to choose to be gay/lesbian? To be scorned by majority of society? To not have support from friends and family? Even Allan Pease, Barbara Pease, the authors of “Why Men Don't Listen and Women Can't Read Maps: How We're Different and What to Do About It” (ISBN 0767907639) states that being gay/lesbian is NOT a choice. People believe what they want to believe.

I have to add that sexuality is a spectrum and not black and white issue. If people start realising that, thanks would be easier. I think this article explains this very well but……

I think that lots of misconception stems from ignorance, something that narrow/closed minded people can never get rid of. Recently I spoke to a Muslim friend of mine and realised that he hate the Jews because he said they were dirty, not fearful of God (pagans in fact) and that he would never be friends or get to know a Jew because he/she was a Jew. Gosh, I was astounded! I could not believe that the deep resentment for a group of people is because of ignorance and that he and people like him will never bother to open their minds to know the other party before making judgements. And mind you he’s not a very devout Muslim either (not gay).

Armed with that I went to talk to my Jewish friends and found out that they felt the same way. Wow! No wonder there can never be any reconciliation between the 2 peoples. I’ve also found out that the gay Jews were more willing to get to know the Muslims (or try and they said) then their heterosexual counterparts. I have a feeling this is because we know what it is like to be judged by labels and we (the GLBT community) is trying (most of us anyway) not to do that.

I believe that being discriminated against has it merits. It makes us more mindful that there are other different people out there and that nobody should be judged especially not by preconceived ideas. Understanding comes after tolerance.


* There are a lot of same sex couples that have not been in the 'limelight' because their relationships last without the bond (binding) of marriage. It is a cause for celebration as it is not easy without the support of government and society. I take my hat off to all couples (straight or otherwise) that are not married and yet have built a life together.
# There have been lots of scientific papers published that shows that homosexuals are born not made. One of the best papers that I’ve read is “Sexually dimorphic gene expression in mouse brain precedes gonadal differentiation” by Phoebe Dewing et al, Molecular Brain Research 118 (2003) 82-90.

As I said before......

My parents can NEVER listen to my opinions. As I suspected, they rearranged my room when I was out of the house! So pissed.

They really don't realise that their bloody ideas are not welcomed at all!

OM......

My room? Yea riiiiiiiiight...

My parents want to ‘renovate’ my room again. And again, they tell me what they want to do, not asking for my opinion mind you, telling.

“So we’ll be changing your window chest of drawers,” my mom.
“What? Why?” me
“So that you have more space to put your stuff.”
“But I don’t need more space.”
“It would be better.”

I said I didn’t want it and it was insisted on me saying that it would be better for me and then the justification comes in. When it comes to my room, or more like my pseudo-room, my opinions never matters, their opinions are the only ones that matter.

So fed-up, it is always like that. They make a decision and just do it. No consultation, just “we are going to this to ‘your’ room, it is for your own good so it is no use saying you don’t want it”.

Gosh, I need to move out!

Yea, if I did I wouldn’t hear the end of it. So now I just have to sit back and wait till I’m 35 to get an apartment of my own. *sigh* long time more to go. Which means that there’ll be lots of bitching and being angry about the lack of freedom. This isn’t good. Must try to be patient and just accept the things that I cannot change. Ha! This coming from an impatient and hot-tempered person. But must try. Om......

The rise of HIV infection in Singapore

It is amazing that our ministers are allowed to spew nonsense and nobody contradicts them, especially when it concerns the GLBT community.

I think that it is time the gahmen of Singapore realises that we are also their citizens and that since we are a secular society where religion has no part to pay in politics or gahmen policies, they should stop trying to marginalise us anymore. Yes, we are different, we love people of the same sex but making us out to be criminals and the bearer of death is not going to solve the problem. The gahmen has always been like this for as long as I know, in order to please the majority, they would sacrifice the minority, in order to get re-elected they would prefer to fan stereotypes then to allow groups or societies to educate the masses. And no, we DO NOT recruit, being gay is not a choice, even though I believe that most of our members of parliament believe that it is. Gosh, are they still living in the Victorian era? Why is it what people do in private is of concern to the gahmen? They are even trying to decriminalise oral sex! Gosh.

As a so-called 'first world' country, we still have decade to catch up with the other first world countries in terms of opinions and mind-sets and policies that don't discriminate. Even Taiwan and Hong Kong, countries that have not obtained their first world status is even more open minded and accepting of different types of people than we are. Taiwan is talking about giving equal rights to same-sex couples and Hong Kong has been holding a gay and lesbian film festival for the past 16 years and they had a gay and lesbian conference last year that was organised by the government of Hong Kong.

Yes, the rise is a concern, but making unjust, homophobic and baseless statements in parliament by the senior minister of health will not help the already bad situation, in fact it would make it worse, gay men or more correctly, men have sex with men (some who don't call themselves gay) will go underground and stop testing themselves. The straight community would start to think that HIV/AIDS is a 'gay disease' and become complacent. Too bad he didn't engage what little brains he had before starting his mouth. Oh by the way Balaji Sadasivan (the aforementioned minister) won an "Just Shut Up" Award.



Taken from mrbrown.com
Hypothesis: Aids MAY be spread by gays breathing on you!!!

I propose that the Government ban all gay parties, especially on our National Day. I read that nine out of 10 of the new Aids sufferers in Singapore last year, are men and a third of them are gay. It’s them darn homo parties, I tell you.

Dr Balaji Sadasivan, who won a spot in David Salyer's "Just Shut Up" Awards, did say it was only a hypothesis, and more research needs to be done.

Sure, hypothesis only, but can get mentioned on the front page of ST first.

And what's up with the "unnamed expert"? Why? Scared all the angry homos go and scold this expert, issit? Or worse, go there and breathe on him to give him Aids, issit?

You don't know, meh? Aids MAY be spread by gay people breathing on the rest of us "normal" people. It's so far only a hypothesis by an expert who shall remain unnamed, and more research needs to be done. But I thought I'd mention it first.



Even Mr Miyagi made a great points.

Two-thirds of AIDS sufferers may say Straits Times is spot-on

They cannot possibly be so dumb, folks.

Don't buy it. In every sense of the word. The statement, and especially, the reporting of the statement. They cannot possibly be so gong.

I'm pulling a very long bow here, but I think the ST may be just trying to make itself more relevant, albeit in a very, very perverse way. So, don't buy a word they're saying. They may be just pulling your chains so you'll talk about them. They may be just making you wonder who that 'unnamed expert' is, whether he/she is from the CDC, the MOH or from some department totally unrelated to health and medicine, but so happens to be an epidemiologist.

I mean, they may just want you to do the math and get worked up: 1/3 of new AIDS cases are gay means 'gay parties may have led to a sharp rise in new AIDS cases'.

They also may just want you to know how they're tackling the epidemic, and how it is global, because gays from high prevalent societies, they come to party and end up 'seeding the local community with infection'.

Right now, you may be thinking about what the MOH is doing to work and manage a cure, whether anyone at the Biopolis Hub Thing is working on something, whether there are drug trials, whether they'll do something once Snowball and Nation moves to Bangkok and the number of AIDS cases rises anyway, and whether they'll say 1/3 of new AIDS cases are gay means gay parties in Bangkok may have led to a sharp rise in AIDS cases because gay men went to Bangkok, whether we may be living in the Dark Ages.

You may say what you want, but don't say Straits Times never make you think!


P.S. mrbrown and Mr Miyagi are straight and married but NOT narrow*

* This 'clause' is there just in case some people think that only the GLBT community think this way.

Very good rebuttal

I came from NUS and when I read the article in the Straits Times stating that "NUS has beaten Princeton and Cornell" in social sciences I couldn't help but read it with disbelief. Now at least I'm not the only one who doesn't agree. The following rebuttal (taken from Scroobal from Sammyboy forum) really takes the cake and I totally agree with it.

-------------------------------------------------

I think it is a sparkling testament to NUS and the country.

It is no surprise as we have repeatedly achieved high accolades in the various disciplines that have been unanimously identified as Singaporean in nature and in form.

Singapore remarkable credits include the nobel prize in a number of fields. Our Patent applications flood the Patent office around the world. We discovered the cure for aids, sent women to the moon, changed iron to gold and found the holy grail. We invented the tissue paper, the condom and the printing press. Our latest invention is Newater and the product name won the award for most innovative branding name in the history of marketing.

Our automobiles ply the O'Bahns, the expressways and the turnpikes of the every city in the developed world. Our trademark highrise apartments caricatured by lift lendings on every 5th floor is the bedrock of modern town planning and found in many parts of the world.

We taught the Chinese in PRC how to develop their econmomy, their townships and their superannuation for their old age. Our deeds are now adopted as part of the English Language by the entry of the word "Suzhoued" in the Oxford Dictionary meaning "screwed by peasants"

We changed the face of aviation by developing the the world's first Vertical Takeoff aircraft called the Harry Jet. We sell submarines to Sweden, we teach US pilots to fly supersonic jets at Luke Air force base. Our Shipyards launch the largest ocean going passenger vessels and our naval architects designed the hovercraft.

Our world class universities receive scholars all over the world that for the lack of space we send ours to Princeton, Cornell, Columbia, Oxford and Cambridge. Works of our academics are published in distinguished journals like the New England journal of medicine, the New York Law Review and the Oxford Journal of Nuclear Physics. We wrote the book about Plate Tectonics, assembled the human genome and pioneered foot reflexology. We discovered the most elements in the periodic table and predicted that the world was round.

Our alumni include the secretary general of the United Nations, the Prime Ministers of many countries, the Pope, the Ayatollah of Iran, astronaut Neil Armstrong, Steve Jobs and at least half a dozen CEOs of Asia Fortune 500 companies.

Yep, we are indeed better than Princeton.

ps. we unfortunately are still trying to pick out a national dress.

Tolerance

It seems in this world the more we progress the more we become intolerant of other people. I'm not only talking about sexual diversity but also of language, race and creed. This is happening everyone, even in the places where all people are considered equal. I’m talking about the Church here. Every time the Christian church makes a notice about gay rights and so on, I get worked up about it and then get sad, realising that the one place that I was suppose to feel safe in not there for me at all. I wonder if this is the church the Christ founded.

I’m a cradle Catholic and from the time I realised that I’m gay, I’ve felt nothing but God’s love for me. I became very spiritual and really love the church. The church, not the hierarchy. I couldn’t care less about the hierarchy, which is the Vatican, the people who can never seen beyond their own noses. I personally feel the hierarchy of the church is like the Pharisees of the Jesus’ time. I know a lot of religious rights people who would crucify me because of this but to say the least, I don’t really care. I believe that if my God is as petty and narrow-minded as they are, then I don’t think heaven would be a place for me. We can actually throw away the hymns that say “God is love” and etc. as apparently these churches believe that God actually hates some people.

Can you believe a church that doesn’t learn from its own mistakes? The chuch believed that the Africans who they believed were the spawn of the devil (this is recorded in the Catholic church achieves) on account of their skin colour, the burnt women on the stack because they believe that they were witches, they the protestants were cults of the devil because they broke off from the ‘true’ church, places Galileo under house arrest because he said the earth revolved around the sun, etc. Up till today, the ‘Pharisees’ in the Vatican and its hierarchy still think they are infallible.

I have a feeling that people are not happy until they can discriminate against some people or another. It was the Africans before then the Jews, the feminist and now the GLTB community. Well, all I can say it is a privilege to be able to know the ‘evils’ of discrimination. If I’m not gay, I wouldn’t be able to see the world as I see it now. A place that is beautiful but ……

People have to start realising that being spiritual and being religious are 2 different things. A country that is ruled by religion is a country that is doomed to fail. Europe is the best example, a continent that allowed the Church to rule. Where the rich were exalted and the poor stepped upon. It is only when they separated church and state, i.e. became a secular government, that we see society progressing as it should. We all know that the darkest periods in the history of Europe was when the Church ruled it.

I believe the site www.tolerance.org really is a wonderful site. Also this www.soulforce.org which believes in educating people and that the enemy is not the homophobes/heterosexist but untruths, really wonderful site. Really have to be a saint to love the people who hate you.

There is a book by Philip Yancey, "What's So Amazing About Grace?" (ISBN: 0310245656) It is a book that lots of churches hate (the truth hurts I always say). It is not even sold in the Catholic bookshops in Singapore! It takes about the church being not being the grace giver that Christ was. Churches tend to pick and choose the ‘members’ that they want. It is really a wonderful book, I would ask all who are interested to read it, it would really open your eyes about the state of Churches in the world and the hypocrisy involved.